There are six things I like about you, who I believe from the bottom of my heart that you are my long-distance aunt. Not only that we have similar noses and chocolate tones that don't crack and that your geneology can be traced to the valley of a thousand hills in Kwazulu-Natal but that you make people's dreams come true. Recently I have been a sucker for your (Oprah) show on SABC3, which repeats its day show at 22h15. Well, after watching the 22h00 late news I have no option but to relax on my bed and watch you, my most-loved aunt.

Quite recently you've been on a good mood, bringing people from as far as Afrika to the show to be reunited with their family members who are resident in the United States. I often shed a few tears when they shed theirs because Ugandans and South Afrikans we all Bantus and we bleed the same.

However I must acknowledge something that the media (whoever owns it) refuses to acknowledge because it's you who is achieving it. I am grafeful to present the KASIEKULTURE LONGEVITY AWARD to you for having graced the covers of your O magazine since inception to today. Aunt, I know you don't care if Hollywood says the innest celebrity in entertainment is Paris Hilton you'll always put your face on your magazine, each month and still sell millions, each month.

That's possible, I guess that's what you're saying; that everyone is the most beautiful person on earth and shouldn't be ashamed to show their mug to the world, everyday on their television and twelve times as a cover model of your own magazine if possible. Well, my knowledge of branding is limited but I guess such has never been done before by the hordes of pretty faces that came before you. For that aunty, please receive the award. If Paris wants to grace covers she should start her own P magazine.

Let me take you back in time. There's a show you did in 2001 whereby you sent a reporter to Iraq to showcase life there under the Baath Party. There was a mention on the documentary that Saddam Hussein demanded that his mug should be on the front page of all newspapers everyday. You looked concerned, more like 'how can a person demand to be on the cover of newspapers everyday?' It didn't make sense then, how about now?

Maybe you were right, no one should demand that but should start their own magazine and grace its cover - eternally. However having seen you hand out small gifts and big Pontiacs to lots of people over the years I've got my own request which I will communicate to you through the Wish for a Dream Foundation, because even though I swear that we are related I still don't have your mobile number or Gayle's.

My wish is, I might not be Graca Machel, Mother Theresa, Nelson Mandela, Dr Mamphele Ramphele, Gayle, Hillary Clinton, Hellen Zille, Angela Merkel, Alfre Woodad, Afeni Shakur, Winnie Mandela, Gwen Ramokgopa but my only and last wish is to grace the cover of your O magazine.

If you are for real I'm challenging you to give up the cover of your magazine for one month and put me there, warts and all. Is that too much to ask? No ways, I'm not asking you to build me a house in St Lucia, or fix me a Green Card, just to be on the cover of O magazine. You ask yourself what's my story, I pardon your ignorance, Google my name and pick your topic.

I can feel you saying, 'I might hook you up a Pontiac, Kodak camera, dinner with Senator Barack Obama, a date with Kofi Annan or even a candlelit dinner with me in Chicago but gracing the cover of my magazine dude'.

Well, story of my life. This is food for thought about how giving my aunt is. Maybe she can hook me there, maybe not, what do you think?

PS. I think 50cent does not make sense when he accuses you of brushing the egos of middle age white American housewives on your show, he should start his own show because you've never accused him of not featuring you in G-Unit because that's his crew. Everyone for themselves!

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