"For a couple of decades and some, African girls, with little or no assistance (and a lot of opposition), are completely responsible for the upkeep and maintenance of their vaginas. Then, one day, when a man decides he wants exclusive rights to it, a bunch of uncles (who never call on sick days, birthdays, exam days and first period days) get to transact over this vagina.
Then, there is the comment about virginity testing, along the lines of ‘if they make them take HIV tests then they should also take virginity tests’ – the Oprah girls, if you’re not following. Ahh, the VGT – how overrated virginity is. The value placed on it by society is just a patriarchy tool for keeping women ‘in their place’. I have a suggestion – if men want virgins, why don’t they stop fucking the world out of them? Virginity is a male issue

St Lucas the Ribelatti takes up the debate started by Karabo Kgoleng this week.

Human beings always cloud issues. Maybe it is because their brains are clouded. So what does this have to do with Oprah and the sanctity of a young learner’s vagina? Good question. Answer: It has to do with the fact that we always cloud issues and raise concerns where they refuse to be raised.

Okay, the richest self-made woman in the world decides to take a spoon-full of dollars out of her pool of wealth and put it in the education of post-apartheid South African girls. (Read girls, not virgins). Okay, since she is trying to empower them to take responsibility for their lives, she decides to get these underprivileged ones to take an HIV test. For a mind that is not clouded, what’s wrong with this picture except that a standing ovation is missing for the queen? If you are living in a world built on the sands of ignorance you are bound to see HIV as a joke and you are more likely to think you can probably cleanse yourself from the virus with a bar of soap. This actually sounds more like you’ve been in the bar for some time and you need to just take a bold stand and confess, "Hi, my name is…, and I have a problem." Truly, this is no time to fuck around when it comes to the AIDS issue. Chances are that you are more likely to be fucked by this shit. Who knows, perhaps in your next careless shagging session, you might just get yourself some HIV. Yes, you are right, this is actually not funny. Not at all. It’s real, whether man-created or god-indorsed. The reality is that there’s a thing that does something to people’s bodies. This thing is more harmful than cigarette smoke. But like cigarette smoke it affects even people who have never seen the light of day or committed any wicked act. It punishes children from their mothers’ wombs for the sake of their parents’ love for infected orgasms. So I become consumed by emphatic anger when others choose to cloud the issue surrounding Oprah’s need to test her "children" for the murderous virus.

If I must be honest with you, as an underpaid young entrepreneur trading in spoken and written words, it is rather unsafe for me to have my sexual self tested for AIDS. The reason is that at this hopeful age of my life, which is nothing but a spate of fantasies to leave the ghetto for an up-market sub-urban neighbourhood, I do not want anything to do with bad news. It took a lot of courage for me to ignore our miserable ghetto reality and believe I can make it in life. With all the negativity I encounter, all the false promises and disappointments, I don’t believe I am ready to open my ears to heart-piercing news. If I am to test positive I will have to gunner up more strength to battle yet another tragic existence. That will set me back. It I said that if it can’t kill you it will make you stronger. I believe this one might kill me. So for now, ignorance is bliss and what I don’t know won’t kill me.

The reality with HIV, and the reason I give Oprah the thumbs-up for implementing tests on the kids, is that you have to be in possession of mechanisms to deal with it. With a pocket as deep as that of the talk goddess, I believe HIV can be a minor irritation. But imagine a young fatherless ghetto caffre trying his darnest to stay strong but to be met with the news that "if you are lucky you can live up to ten years!" Not when my motto is "I will not die but live." That’s what keeps me growing even when I plan to assassinate myself by age 32. So the problem with HIV in a poor person’s ignorant mind is that it won’t make him stronger. Never. But if you make around R7 million a day like Oprah does, you are sure that you can keep a positive mind and a healthy diet. If you happen to be Oprah’s daughter and she’s dishing you with an education that can send 10 students to university with, then why not? If you are positive, you don’t have to worry about money, you have to worry about how to spend it. But if you don’t have money but you have HIV, it will be difficult to handle such knowledge. My plan is to be the richest South African in ten years, but I’m not talking posthumously when the insurance pays out. So if I’m dead in ten yeas, what’s the use of trying? But if I have money, what’s the use of crying?

Ten years is a lot of time when your concern is how to spend your millions.
Ten years is a lot of time when you are getting free education and free nutrition.
Ten years is a long time, and a privilege when you are just living for the fun of it.
Ten years is a short time when you spend half your day slavering for other rich humans who are busy deciding on how to spend your sweat.

If Oprah offered me a million bucks so I can establish my ITC companies and start living my dream, I would test tomorrow. But if I still have to wonder what I will be eating tomorrow, an HIV test is an insult. We all know that Manto has not time to make house-to-house deliveries of anti-retroviral medication and some lekker kos. So why should the poor volunteer to know they are dying and that no one is going to help them? Why should the poor be told to have a positive mind when negativity is part of the national budget? So why worry when the goddess of money herself tells girls she can help to test? So why should they go for virginity tests? All virgins dream of the day they get deflowered. But none of us really dream to be HIV positive. It’s a fucking truth, all virgins shall be un-virgined. Oprah is not teaching these girls to be lesbian.

Oprah is teaching these girls not to depend on males but to love themselves enough to know that they don’t gotta have sex to have money. What’s wrong with that education? The US government pays 200 times Oprah’s wealth to teach young men how to rape and kill children in the war on terrorism. Sounds like somebody needed someone like Oprah to take them to school years ago. Maybe we’d define terrorism better and stop clouding words.

If I dilly-dallied, my point is that unlike our government Oprah was encouraging people to test for HIV knowing she’d provide help when they need it. What’s virginity testing? Only men have the right to test a virgin. That’s our life-given prerogative. What does a woman take after she has tested negative for virginity? An anti-penal drug or something – or an opportunity to be shamed? Think of it. My philosophy is that the truth lives between the legs of women, and we will always go looking for it. Virginity tests are a waste of time because one must get laid. But HIV tests are something else coz one can stay negative if taking the correct precautions.

Fuck all the kak, Oprah has money, let her give her girls the opportunity to live like princesses.
Let me publish a book and sell a million copies I will gladly test for that whack shit. Being clouded is not a favour to anyone. Stick to what is real and what you know. Otherwise, watch out for the book called How to Fool Eve into Spreading her Legs for YOU. 4kof Satan

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous3/05/2007

    loving it, man!


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